...i'm tying desperately to hold on the this feeling, to own it the way i've owned all of the negative ones...to live in the moment is so painfully difficult when what i am really living for is to wake up...but to appreciate this moment of relief, this morning that has gone on without the stagnating fear and pain that i've grown accustomed to over the last few months...that is what i am doing, in this moment i feel able to go on...
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