...but i'm not...i'm thinking about packing...what do i take...i suppose i need a hospital bag and a bag for my parent's house...but the things i want in the hospital don't fit in a small bag that would seem appropraite for a room...i want my new amazing bathrobe...my new nighties...my new slippers...my own pillow...they don't fit in an overnight bag...fuck it...i'm packing a suitcase...then i will just take that to my parent's...then i will have options...i know i need to pair it down...but you try to pair it down...i dare you...jump in my shoes for just one second and try to regulate...good fucking luck...
...do i need the robe in the hospital...will all the things coming out of me...tubes, hoses, drains, whatever...fit underneath? i was given the most amazing robe by jackie and michael...but it's huge...so plush...it will never fit in a small bag...fuck it i'm taking it...
...do i need nighties or can i wear jammie bottoms? i have been given so many beautiful button up the front jammies with bottoms....can i wear those in the hospital? how long before i can wear bottoms? so i know i should pack nighties, but how many...and jammies are my preference...i don't want to be there and want them and not have them...fuck it i'm taking them...
...how long will i be in the hospital? how many wardrobe changes? why do i even care? i'm not going to then...i just don't want to be dirty...hospitals smell...i don't want to smell...i want all clean beautiful things...and i have them...i just want them with me...fuck it i'm taking it all...
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